Papa's Visit In My Dream

I'm so glad that my dad visited me in my dream yesterday. It was all blurry, as with any other dream but the definition of his face was crystal clear. He was lying on a bed and he just stood beside me, asking me to place an electricfan beside his bed as well as hand him a blanket. He was looking fine- not too healthy and not too sickly. When I gave him what he asked, he went back to bed and slept. I really have no idea on what was it about. I can't even produce a "possible" explanation as to what happened. Nevertheless, I felt better seeing him alive in my dream. That's the only way I can see him alive, aside from the photos of our wonderful times together, as well as the videos which showed the bittersweet memories of him- the Christmas celebrations and the random shots filled with his smiles, his voice and laughter, as well as a video in a hospital where he was lying for several days, talking with a voice that was never really "him"- weak, tired and in pain. God I miss him terribly, especially now that his birthday is approaching. It's been almost two years, but the pain still brings me to tears. Tears that express all the guilt, regret, sadness and loss...

Sometimes, when I look at your photos, I couldn't believe that you're really gone... I miss you Pops!

2nd New Year Without Papa

Time flies by very fast indeed. Before we knew it, we were all geared up towards meeting the new year 2014. We have decided to celebrate it at my brother Allan house. I was very happy to spend it with my family but still feel a sense of incompleteness knowing that Papa isn't with us anymore. We brought his photo there, offered a prayer and talked about a lot of familial stuff but still that void will never be filled. The challenge is how we would face that reality. And we all have chosen to deal with it with a whole lot of positivity. I know Papa is guiding us every in every step we take- taking care of us and praying for us. He will always be in our hearts forever. 


Dad, you will never be forgotten... Happy New Year!

Papa's 40th Day Death Anniversary

    They say that the 40th day from a person's passing is the start of his ascension to heaven. It is the beginning of his journey towards God. What a wonderful feeling it is of going back to the arms of your Creator!  It is a day of celebration, filled with prayers, good food and talking about the wonderful memories of the departed one. 

    Last January 18, 2013 was my Papa's 40th day Death Anniversary. I thank God that we were able to carry it out successfully and for not being too much affected by the grief that we're still experiencing. My brother Allan and his wife Elfie were not able to come because they were at her hometown during that time for a family reunion and also needed to be present for her mom's surgery. But knowing Papa, I know he understood. 

    Despite our limited budget, we made sure that everything was covered during my Papa's 40th day Death Anniversary. From the women who led the fervent prayers before 12:00 pm, the time of ascension of my Papa's soul, to the  foods, drinks, chit-chats, flowers, balloons, tarpaulin etc. - everything to honor the life God has blessed him. Indeed even in death, his life will always be celebrated. I thank God for making Papa an instrument for us to live, grow and lead the generations ahead of us.  

flowers, candles, food, crucifix for Papa's  epitaph
(The wind was blowing very hard, we had to lay down the candles and cross.)

Having lunch right after holding the prayers.

It's ironic, my Papa never experienced having balloons or parties  in his childhood.
Until now.

Sometimes it just doesn't sink in...

Letting go of the balloons signifies our surrendering of
Papa to the Lord. 

One balloon, one prayer to God and a message for Papa uttered silently

Of course, with that fighting cock photo, Papa would have loved this!

♥♥♥

Are you holding your loved-one's 40th Day Death Anniversary soon? 

What are your plans to commemorate him/her?
Be strong and know that your loved one's memories live in you!

Celebrating our First New Year Without Papa

     Celebrating the New Year of 2013 was a bit challenging as it is the first celebration without Papa around. Top it off with his recent passing last December 10, it was painful indeed. Everything's still fresh. The pain from the wounds of losing one of the most important people in my life who shaped my well-being, were still in my heart. But we need to move on. We need to go forward. For the sake of our children and our children's children we need to get up and embrace life as it is. The combination of pains and happiness, sorrows and cheeriness. That's life. 

Happy New Year Papa!!

                                                 

Celebrating New Year of 2013

Enjoying the good food and the bonding.

Fireworks!! 

The yummy Mango Bravo of Conti's Bakeshop

Thank you Lord for these blessings and the gift of another year!

Dinner @ Ate Mher and Kuya Tom's house

@ Ate Mher's house on Jan. 1, after we visited Papa's resting place.

Julius, Kuya Eric, Love, Ate Elfe, Muting, Solen, Moi and Mama