Remembering My Parents' Marriage

Celebrating our 12th wedding anniversary was a blast! My hubby, our son, and I spent it in an urban getaway. We stayed at a hotel, went swimming, tried out several dishes, took some ice cream and cake to our suite and had a super great bonding time!  I think about the 3 decades that my mom and dad have shared. There have been challenges but they've always been strong enough to overcome them. I gain inspiration and strength from the love, faith and dedication that my mom and dad shared with each other during their marriage. 


"Dad, although you're no longer here, please be a guiding hand to us in preserving our marriage and family happily."

My Daddies!

The past 2 weeks of this month were sooo difficult, that all I had to do was to surrender everything to God. In those days, I've regularly went to my parents' bedroom, talked to my dad's photo, and asked him to pray for me. I've also requested him to guide me during this very challenging time that I've almost wanted to give up. I've been calling the names of my two fathers - my dad and God - to help me, guide me and give me the strength for my problem to be over.

Guess what?

My daddies really listened! :) God indeed exists and my dad's guiding hand has always been with me. I couldn't thank them enough for taking good care of me and my family during the time of trouble. All we need to do is call their name.

I love my daddies! 

Praise the Lord! 

Thank you Pops!

Papa's Visit In My Dream

I'm so glad that my dad visited me in my dream yesterday. It was all blurry, as with any other dream but the definition of his face was crystal clear. He was lying on a bed and he just stood beside me, asking me to place an electricfan beside his bed as well as hand him a blanket. He was looking fine- not too healthy and not too sickly. When I gave him what he asked, he went back to bed and slept. I really have no idea on what was it about. I can't even produce a "possible" explanation as to what happened. Nevertheless, I felt better seeing him alive in my dream. That's the only way I can see him alive, aside from the photos of our wonderful times together, as well as the videos which showed the bittersweet memories of him- the Christmas celebrations and the random shots filled with his smiles, his voice and laughter, as well as a video in a hospital where he was lying for several days, talking with a voice that was never really "him"- weak, tired and in pain. God I miss him terribly, especially now that his birthday is approaching. It's been almost two years, but the pain still brings me to tears. Tears that express all the guilt, regret, sadness and loss...

Sometimes, when I look at your photos, I couldn't believe that you're really gone... I miss you Pops!

Strengthened By Faith

I did one of the most drastic decisions in my life last year- and now I did one again. I full of optimism and faith that God will grant us success in every endeavor that we are going to make. I don't want to be stuck in my comfort zone and be scared forever for failing. The worst has happened to me- that's losing my dad- and I don't wanna lose the essence of living while I am still alive.

Thank you Lord for the enlightenment and strength. I surrender everything to you. Please continually guide us. 

Papa, thank you for inspiring us. You are always remembered and loved!

Another Great Song To Aid My Grief

I've been listening to the song Takipsilim since last week and hands down to Gloc 9 and Regine Velasquez! Being in the same genre of OPM but having different styles, I never expected that their collaboration will become a huge success! Musically, the song is superb. Not too melancholic and not that upbeat. It's a great candidate for a LSS (Last Song Syndrome) indeed. Lyrically, it's one of the best. I could say that the literal meaning and the underlying tones of the song discuss a lot of things in life. The song is like a short story that tackles about the people we lose, the actions we did prior to losing that special someone, the regrets, the realization that we couldn't never take them back and the lesso- everything enveloped with a music that is a mixture of subtle melodies that allows you to reminisce and reflect and the upbeat tones that'll energize you with loads of positivity and to look forward to a brand new life! To learn from the mistakes of the past, to face what has happened with full acceptance and an undying faith to God to get up and move on with our lives from that pain.


*Will include a YouTube link soon! :)

2nd Memorial Tattoo

I have gotten my 2nd Tribute tat for my father several days after his 1st Death Anniversary and just a couple of days before Christmas. I did it to honor his memories and also the pain I've went through with it signifies the end of my mourning. But as I've stated with my recent blog, I don't think my grief will end. Nevertheless, it's one of the gifts that I had for him as I do believe that my prayers, cherishing his memories and the pain I had while getting the tat done are the intangible things that I feel are worth offering to him.

It's his signature with a heart!! :)


I love you so much Pops! Don't know if you still feel our love or we will meet again but FAITH is the only thing that keeps me holding on.