For my VLs (Vacation Leave) to be approved! I've filed for these dates: October 29-November 1, followed by my weekend off. I am praying and hoping for this to be granted as the 29th of October is my me and my hubby's 11th Wedding Anniversary followed by our preparation for our overnight stay at my Papa's Resting place in All Saint's Day and All Soul's Day. We'll be doing this on the 31st of October.
My brother Allan also has arranged a trip to the majestic Potipot Island, Zambales on the 2nd and 3rd of November so I am praying God to grant me these VLs to be approved and for Papa to pray for me so that I could spend some time with him at his gravesite as well as to bond with our family and not to be too much exhausted and time-pressured with our trip. Nevertheless, I am hopeful that we could pull this off successfully!
Lord, please give this to me! Papa, please pray for me. All for the family! We miss you so much Pops!
Papa
Friday, October 25, 2013
First All Saint's Day Without Papa
Gosh, time runs extremely fast. Couldn't believe that it has been 10 months since my Dad's passing and his First Death Anniversary is fast approaching.
Filipinos have very strong familial ties. And I wouldn't get surprised that even in death we still commemorate our loved ones who have passed away. During All Saint's Day, it has been a practice to celebrate this event the contemporary way- Halloween parties, trick or treats, wearing scary clothes which are also a fun way, especially with the kids. But what I love about this occasion is going to the cemetery, spending the night of October 31st and/or November 1st with family and relatives on the gravesite of our departed loved ones. I remember our family doing this since I was a kid. During my gradeschool years, we spend the night at my Aunt Encar's gravesite in Paraiso, San Mateo. She is my Papa's older sister. When I reached highschool and moved to Marikina, we often visited and spent All Saint's Day at my niece Anna Loren's gravesite in Heaven's Gate Memorial Gardens. Though we still visit our Aunt Encar's and our other departed relatives' resting place during this occasion as well, we made it a point to spend the night at Anna's since her death in 1998 due to dengue. We usually hold a prayer offered to Anna then just have some bonding time with the rest of the family. I remember my Papa and my brothers told horror stories that just made the night more fun and spooky. :)
On October 31st will be the 1st All Saint's Day Eve we are to spend with my Papa- in his gravesite, beside Anna Loren's.
Yesterday morning, before I went to bed, I was crying for almost an hour, remembering my Papa and recalling his loving ways. I miss him!!!
Then I had a dream that he was in a very beautiful place- clouds like huge cotton candies and and bright sunny skies. I think it's his way of telling me not to be so sad coz he's in a better place.
I love you so much Pops!
Filipinos have very strong familial ties. And I wouldn't get surprised that even in death we still commemorate our loved ones who have passed away. During All Saint's Day, it has been a practice to celebrate this event the contemporary way- Halloween parties, trick or treats, wearing scary clothes which are also a fun way, especially with the kids. But what I love about this occasion is going to the cemetery, spending the night of October 31st and/or November 1st with family and relatives on the gravesite of our departed loved ones. I remember our family doing this since I was a kid. During my gradeschool years, we spend the night at my Aunt Encar's gravesite in Paraiso, San Mateo. She is my Papa's older sister. When I reached highschool and moved to Marikina, we often visited and spent All Saint's Day at my niece Anna Loren's gravesite in Heaven's Gate Memorial Gardens. Though we still visit our Aunt Encar's and our other departed relatives' resting place during this occasion as well, we made it a point to spend the night at Anna's since her death in 1998 due to dengue. We usually hold a prayer offered to Anna then just have some bonding time with the rest of the family. I remember my Papa and my brothers told horror stories that just made the night more fun and spooky. :)
On October 31st will be the 1st All Saint's Day Eve we are to spend with my Papa- in his gravesite, beside Anna Loren's.
Yesterday morning, before I went to bed, I was crying for almost an hour, remembering my Papa and recalling his loving ways. I miss him!!!
Then I had a dream that he was in a very beautiful place- clouds like huge cotton candies and and bright sunny skies. I think it's his way of telling me not to be so sad coz he's in a better place.
I love you so much Pops!
Wednesday, September 25, 2013
My Papa's 1st Birthday After His Death
On September 8, 2013 was my Papa's birthday. If he's still alive, he would be 64 by now.
Last year, in Leyte, he was already admitted in the hospital several days prior to his birthday. Then he was discharged on the 7th. On his birthday, he celebrated it with our relatives, friends and neighbors. His diet was still controlled back then but still he was very happy to be able to spend the day with cheeriness and warmth with the people who have become a part of his life. I sent a cash gift to him and phoned him and my mom. The thought of that day being his last birthday never crossed my mind.
The next day he was admitted to the hospital again.
Oh, he really wanted to get out of the hospital to spend that special day!
We celebrated his celestial birthday on a Sunday, September 8th, 2013 at his resting place. We brought a lot of his fave foods, flowers and prepared a slideshow of his pictures. We didn't include the ones where he was suffering at the hospital- just photos where my Papa was smiling and free from all pain.
We spent the rainy afternoon, holding a prayer, telling stories about Papa, memories and events that lighten our mood. It's pretty hard to deal with his first birthday after his death but we don't have any choice but to move forward and cherish his memories.
"We will celebrate you mourn, and mourn you less."
Happy 64th Birthday Papa!!! We miss you terribly. We love you dearly Pops!
Last year, in Leyte, he was already admitted in the hospital several days prior to his birthday. Then he was discharged on the 7th. On his birthday, he celebrated it with our relatives, friends and neighbors. His diet was still controlled back then but still he was very happy to be able to spend the day with cheeriness and warmth with the people who have become a part of his life. I sent a cash gift to him and phoned him and my mom. The thought of that day being his last birthday never crossed my mind.
The next day he was admitted to the hospital again.
Oh, he really wanted to get out of the hospital to spend that special day!
We celebrated his celestial birthday on a Sunday, September 8th, 2013 at his resting place. We brought a lot of his fave foods, flowers and prepared a slideshow of his pictures. We didn't include the ones where he was suffering at the hospital- just photos where my Papa was smiling and free from all pain.
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| The slideshow of Papa's photos |
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| Our family during his birthday |
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| Two birthday cakes and a huge Amber's spaghetti- mouthwatering! |
We spent the rainy afternoon, holding a prayer, telling stories about Papa, memories and events that lighten our mood. It's pretty hard to deal with his first birthday after his death but we don't have any choice but to move forward and cherish his memories.
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| Papa's cap. I could still smell his scent on it! |
"We will celebrate you mourn, and mourn you less."
Happy 64th Birthday Papa!!! We miss you terribly. We love you dearly Pops!
Sunday, August 25, 2013
My Brother Allan's First Birthday Without Papa
Last August 10 was my Kuya Allan's 35th Birthday. And it was his first birthday without Papa. We celebrated his birthday dinner at Trinity Restaurant in Seaside Macapagal Avenue. We have met them there after they bought the seafood and meat to be cooked or otherwise called "Paluto" at Trinity Restaurant. Hubby and I dropped by at Bannaple first to buy a Banoffee Cake as our birthday gift for him. We then asked the Banapple staff to put "Happy Birthday Tito Ato" on the cake. My son calls my brother "Tito Ato" as here in the Philippines, we often call our uncles "Tito"; my brother being a lawyer, the "Ato" is a shortened name for "Attorney. The place is really cozy and comfortable too. I'm used to eating grilled foods in an open restaurant (We call those places here in Manila as "Dampa" or "Ihaw-Ihaw") but Trinity has an atmosphere of an elegant but cozy air-conditioned restaurant. There was a strip of restaurants too where people could eat outside if they want to listen to a band or to dine inside. If I'm not mistaken, Trinity also offers live bands as I saw a mic stand, musical instruments and other band thingies on a nook inside. The food, service and place are great!
The food was astonishingly delicious! It's as if we had our personal waiter too. Shrimps, Grilled Squid, Adobo, Sisig, Sinigang sa Miso, Ensaladang Mangga and Crispy Pata were served, among others. Mouthwatering yet sinfully delicious! We reminded our Mom to just get a little portion of every bit of it as she has a maintenance for having a high blood pressure. She already took Blopress (I believe) prior to eating just to be sure. Those foods were my Papa's favorite, I should know! Aah, it kills me inside thinking that last year he was still with us and now all we do is wishful thinking...
The next day, we all decided to visit Papa at his grave-site. It was a rainy afternoon, but we have decided to go there by hook or by crook. My brother asked Ate Lita to cook Pancit Canton, Mixed Pork and Chicken Adobo and Ensaladang Mangga. Hubby and I dropped by at JCo Donuts and bought 2 dozens of assorted ones. My Mom is a certified nut-lover and I didn't get surprised when the Alcapone became her favorite. I still love the Avocado Dicaprio. Glad that our contact at the cemetery was able to prepare the tent and 10 chairs so we could stay there comfortably, bond with the rest of the family and with my Pops too, in spirit, :) !
It's true we all have to deal with the loss and move on with our lives, coz if Papa was still here, I think he wanted us to do so. As long as we remain strong for each other and we include him in our prayers and in all the important events in our lives, Pops will remain alive.
will post photos soon
The food was astonishingly delicious! It's as if we had our personal waiter too. Shrimps, Grilled Squid, Adobo, Sisig, Sinigang sa Miso, Ensaladang Mangga and Crispy Pata were served, among others. Mouthwatering yet sinfully delicious! We reminded our Mom to just get a little portion of every bit of it as she has a maintenance for having a high blood pressure. She already took Blopress (I believe) prior to eating just to be sure. Those foods were my Papa's favorite, I should know! Aah, it kills me inside thinking that last year he was still with us and now all we do is wishful thinking...
The next day, we all decided to visit Papa at his grave-site. It was a rainy afternoon, but we have decided to go there by hook or by crook. My brother asked Ate Lita to cook Pancit Canton, Mixed Pork and Chicken Adobo and Ensaladang Mangga. Hubby and I dropped by at JCo Donuts and bought 2 dozens of assorted ones. My Mom is a certified nut-lover and I didn't get surprised when the Alcapone became her favorite. I still love the Avocado Dicaprio. Glad that our contact at the cemetery was able to prepare the tent and 10 chairs so we could stay there comfortably, bond with the rest of the family and with my Pops too, in spirit, :) !
It's true we all have to deal with the loss and move on with our lives, coz if Papa was still here, I think he wanted us to do so. As long as we remain strong for each other and we include him in our prayers and in all the important events in our lives, Pops will remain alive.
will post photos soon
The Best Day by Taylor Swift and Bye Bye by Mariah Carey
I admit, I'm uber emotional. I cry while watching Titanic over and over again. I cry while I watch Finding Nemo. With regards to songs, ever since I was a kid, I listen to a song not solely on the musical arrangement but on the lyrics primarily. Would you believe that when I was still 9 years old, the popular songs of Eraserheads were not my fave, but their single "Poorman's Grave" was at the top of my list? I love the meaning of it.
So now that my Papa's gone, I'm a sucker for all songs that relate to father and daughter relationship, death of a parent or something that tells about a person leaving. Whatever genre it's in, as long as the meaning revolves around those I've mentioned, then I'm a fan of it! It helps me express myself and think about memories with my Papa. The things he has taught me and the way he lived which made me realize important things in life. He was not perfect, nor how he lived his life- from there I should extract the great things and apply them to my life; the not so good ones should serve as a lesson.
I super love the songs "Rainbow" and "Dance With My Father". Recently, these two are my favorite. Here are the lyrics and sources of "Bye Bye" by Mariah Carey and "The Best Day" by Taylor Swift.
Papa, I remember our afternoon naps when I was a kid, our chit-chats, our funny moments- everything. But when I grew older, started out my own family, got busy with work, I just wish I had the chance to say a lot of things more than "I Love You"...
So now that my Papa's gone, I'm a sucker for all songs that relate to father and daughter relationship, death of a parent or something that tells about a person leaving. Whatever genre it's in, as long as the meaning revolves around those I've mentioned, then I'm a fan of it! It helps me express myself and think about memories with my Papa. The things he has taught me and the way he lived which made me realize important things in life. He was not perfect, nor how he lived his life- from there I should extract the great things and apply them to my life; the not so good ones should serve as a lesson.
I super love the songs "Rainbow" and "Dance With My Father". Recently, these two are my favorite. Here are the lyrics and sources of "Bye Bye" by Mariah Carey and "The Best Day" by Taylor Swift.
BYE BYE
by Mariah Carey
This is for my people who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my people who lost their grandmothers
Lift your head to the sky ‘cause we will never say bye
As a child there were them times
I didn’t get it but you kept me in line
I didn’t know why you didn’t show up sometimes
On sunday mornings and I missed you
But when we talked too
All them grown full things
Separation brings
You never let me know it
You never let it show because
You loved me and obviously
There’s so much more left to say
If you were with me today face to face
Chorus
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
“I wish I could talk to you for awhile”
“I wish I could find a way try not to cry”
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I’ll give the whole world to see your face
And I’m bragging right next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye
By-Bye By-bye By-bye
By-Bye By-bye By-bye
By-Bye By-bye By-bye
By-Bye
And you never got the chance to see how good I’ve done
And you never got to see me back at number one
I wish that you were here to celebrate together
I wish that we could spend the holidays together
I remember when you used to tuck me in at night
With the Teddy Bear you gave to me that I held so tight
I thought you were so strong
That you can make it through whatever
It’s so hard to accept the fact you’re gone forever
Chorus
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
“I wish I could talk to you for awhile”
“I wish I could find a way try not to cry”
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I’ll give the world to see your face
And I’m bragging right next to you where
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye
By-Bye By-bye By-bye
By-Bye By-bye By-bye
By-Bye By-bye By-bye
By-Bye
This is for my peoples who just lost somebody
Your best friend, your baby, your man, or your lady
Put your hand way up high
We will never say bye (no, no, no)
Mamas, daddies, sisters, brothers, friends and cousins
This is for my people who lost their grandfather
Lift your head to the sky ‘cause we will never say bye
I never knew I could hurt like this
And everyday life goes on like
“I wish I could talk to you for awhile”
“I wish I could find a way try not to cry”
As time goes by
And soon as you reach a better place
Still I’ll give the world to see your face
And I’m bragging right next to you
It feels like you gone too soon
The hardest thing to do is say bye bye
THE BEST DAY
by Taylor Swift
I’m 5 years old It’s getting cold out
Got my big coat on
I hear your laugh And look up at smilin at you
I run and run
Past the pumpkin patch and the tractor rides
Look now, the sky is gold
I hug your legs and fall asleep
On the way home
I don’t know why all the trees change in the fall oh oh
But I know you’re not scared of anything at all oh oh
Don’t know if Snow White’s house is near or far away
But I know I had the best day with you today
I’m 13 now and don’t know how my friends could be so mean
I come home crying and you hold me tight
And grab the keys
And we drive and drive until we found a town far enough away
And we talk and window shop til I forgotten
All their names
I don’t know who I’m gonna talk to now at school uh uh
But I know I’m laughin pn the car ride home with you uh uh
Don’t know how long it’s gonna take to feel okay but I know I had the best day
With you, today
I have an excellent father
His strength is making me stronger
God smiles on my little brother
Inside and out he’s better than nothin
I grew up in a pretty house
And I had space to run
And I had .. The Best Days with you
There is a video I found
From back when I was three
You set up a paint set in the kitchen
And you’re talkin’ to me
It’s the edge of princesses and pirate ships
And the seven dwarfs
My Daddy’s smart and you’re the prettiest lady in the whole wide world
Now I know why the all the trees change in the fall oh oh
I know you were on my side even when I was wrong
And I love you for giving me your eyes
Staying back and watching me shine
And I didn’t know if you knew
So I’m takin’ this chance to say
I had the best day
With you, today
Papa, I remember our afternoon naps when I was a kid, our chit-chats, our funny moments- everything. But when I grew older, started out my own family, got busy with work, I just wish I had the chance to say a lot of things more than "I Love You"...
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Missing My Pops
Would you believe that when I was falling asleep while typing, I accidentally typed the word "Papa" without knowing it? He's definitely in my heart.
Sunday, July 14, 2013
Dinner With Some of Papa's Favorite Foods
Last night, we had our dinner at Claire dela Fuente's Tiendesitas. Our meal included Barbecue, Liempo, Ensaladang Mangga and Sinigang sa Miso. Imagine those with 4 cups of rice and drinks for only 430 pesos, what a deal! Hubby and I had Iced Tea for our drinks and Skylar had his Fruitas Mango Shake. As we were eating, the thought of Papa has crossed my mind. Liempo and Sinigang sa Miso were his favorites! I know, if he's still around, he's probably with us right at that moment having dinner with us and his apo.
The other day I had a dream of him. He looked so sickly and his hair was a bit long too. But there he was, again, smiling at us. I am glad that most of my dreams where he appeared he seemed happy and contented, free from all those physical pains...
I was crying a few hours before this writing. I miss him so much and I could definitely say that I'm still mourning.
The other day I had a dream of him. He looked so sickly and his hair was a bit long too. But there he was, again, smiling at us. I am glad that most of my dreams where he appeared he seemed happy and contented, free from all those physical pains...
I was crying a few hours before this writing. I miss him so much and I could definitely say that I'm still mourning.
Saturday, June 29, 2013
My Tribute Tattoo For My Papa
A tribute to my Papa that I never thought I'd get. It's my Father's Day gift for him.
Painful but cathartic indeed.
Will post soon.
This one's for you Pops. :)
Painful but cathartic indeed.
Will post soon.
This one's for you Pops. :)
My First Birthday Without Papa
My 29th birthday will be tomorrow. I should be happy as I'll be having a triple celebration- one with my hubby and son, the 2nd one would be with my mom and siblings and the 3rd one's on Thursday after my Vacation Leave with my teammates. I am happy- well I should be. I am grateful to God for all the blessings and years He continues to give me, but honestly speaking I feel a bit sad. It's because it'll be my first birthday without my Papa. I couldn't believe the fact that I'll be celebrating it without him around. It sometimes doesn't sink in, but now it does- and it freakin' hurts.
Tomorrow we're planning to go and visit his resting place in the afternoon before my birthday dinner. Looking back, I remember my birthday parties when I was a kid with him, and he was always present too in my son's birthday parties. I miss him so much. Most of the time, I think that he will always be remembered and he will forever stay in my heart but that thought doesn't console me now that my birthday is approaching and all I have are just his memories. I know if he's here, he would greet me "Happy birthday Joy and will give me a kiss and hug... Oh boy, I super miss him. :(
"Pops, tomorrow is my 29th birthday. Thanks for being with me for more than 28 years. The things you've taught me will remain in me and the lessons in life you've shared with me will continually inspire me, my son and the next generations. I thank you for everything. Please pray for me and our family that God will always guide us, protect us, grant us good health and continually bless us. I love you Papa."
Tomorrow we're planning to go and visit his resting place in the afternoon before my birthday dinner. Looking back, I remember my birthday parties when I was a kid with him, and he was always present too in my son's birthday parties. I miss him so much. Most of the time, I think that he will always be remembered and he will forever stay in my heart but that thought doesn't console me now that my birthday is approaching and all I have are just his memories. I know if he's here, he would greet me "Happy birthday Joy and will give me a kiss and hug... Oh boy, I super miss him. :(
"Pops, tomorrow is my 29th birthday. Thanks for being with me for more than 28 years. The things you've taught me will remain in me and the lessons in life you've shared with me will continually inspire me, my son and the next generations. I thank you for everything. Please pray for me and our family that God will always guide us, protect us, grant us good health and continually bless us. I love you Papa."
Saturday, June 15, 2013
FIRST FATHER'S DAY WITHOUT PAPA
Who would forget the 3rd Sunday of June? Yes, it's the big day for daddies! And as much as we excitedly celebrate Mother's Day so does we commemorate the day for the guys who first loved us, the guys who first protected us and who first took care of us. Of course they're our beloved dads!
Today, I couldn't avoid shedding a tear because I extremely miss my Pops as this is the first Father's Day without him. It's been 6 months but the pain is still here. Now with all those movies and documentaries focusing on topics about fathers, I couldn't help myself from recalling the things my Pops did to show his love for us.
Before, whenever I see quotes about dads who have passed away, I felt touched and a bit sad, but I admit, it probably was a little superficial. But right now, when I see a passage, a saying or a single line stating something about the departed fathers, I just cry out loud... Indeed when this life-changing thing happens to you, it'll eat you up inside.
Here are 5 of the quotes which make me reflect, contemplate and think about my Pops more this Father's Day:
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| From kootation.com |
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| From christianpost.com |
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| From verybestquotes.com |
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| From www.kootation.com |
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| From myquoteshome.com |
Happy Father's Day Pops!! We love you!!
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